The other day I was having a real granddad moment, There I was sitting in my favourite chair, a chair that is only comfy to me, as it and I are old friends!
I had a cup of my favourite hot drink and I was puffing on the soon to be banned cigarette, an occasion I treat as priceless, as it could be the last, before a do-gooder comes through the door with a fire extinguisher!.
Life was just fine and the moment allowed me to drift into the world of problem solving, looking at the searching questions in life and wondering what the future holds for the wee one and the rest of the family. Who could of known relaxing could be so stressful!!!
Seriously life was good.... then from no where came a blood curdling scream, a scream that all in parenting know well, a scream that means that their wee one is in danger, or worse still is hurt, and you need to get there quickly!
I jumped out of my comfy seat spilling my favourite hot drink everywhere and took off in the direction of the screams, my heart pounding as I turned the corner.
There facing me was a wee one frozen like a statue with her finger pointing to her ball, because the wee one was obviously not hurt and now I was on the scene I could protect her from...err the ball! A calm took over in my own head replacing the blind panic that I had been in, the calm then became mild amusement and curiosity at what had caused the wee one to react in such a fashion, a fashion that had my comfy trousers- aye the ones with the extra button for dinner time- covered in my favourite hot drink!!
On closer inspection the ball was not the problem, and I have to say that was a relief in itself, although what had given the wee one such a fright was even smaller than the ball, a tiny wee spider, that up until now had been on a massive journey, an adventure, from one side of the garden to the other, until it had come across a giant ball rolling towards it pursued by the biggest thing the spider had ever seen- the wee one!! After a period of reassurance and showing the wee one this little creature of the garden meant her no harm, a slight, only a slight smile came to her face as she decided my explanation would do, but more importantly, valuable playing time had and was being lost.
So Having made myself a fresh brew and re-acquainted myself with my comfy chair, I turned my attention of thought as to what had made the wee one react in such a fashion, after all most fears are learned from another source. Where had this phobia come from, and just how could I reduce its fear factor. I thought long and hard, aye it was exhausting!
The house occupants like most people in life, all have small phobias of one sort or another, for example the ASBO gardener aka papa has a fear of being caught while carrying out one of his projects, and further he has a strange fear of monkeys and avoids the zoo like the plague, but he has no fears of spiders or the like, no he was not the person who had influenced this particular situation.
The eighteen year old aka my son is scared of the dark after he watches a scary movie, but after that he is pretty fearless, and further more the wee one would not be up to see her uncle peaking round corners before making the dash for the safety of his bed. Again this would not have had any bearing on the wee ones fear.
The Law enforcer aka the chief prosecutor aka the wife, well needless to say she is scared of, aye nothing, not a single fear or at least not one she shows or admits to. No whatever the one had seen that had influenced this fear had not come from here.
I have very few fears in life, however I too have my own phobia which is a fear of planes or more to the point flying, however the wee one has never seen this and so the conclusion yet again is the wee one had not picked up this fear from me.
It was all a bit of a mystery, so much so it had me out of my comfy old friend wandering about scratching my head willing an answer to come forth, I stepped outside to go back to the scene so to speak, to see if something would pop into my head, something that would give me some answers, and as if by some form of Devine intervention, an unassuming early wasp flew by going about its business, who would of thought, the enemy of the picnic could provide the answer to one of life's problems.
A solution it was though, as memories of family get together in the garden over a BBQ and the odd beer came flooding back, with the very real image of my daughter aka the wee ones mum out sprinting Usain Bolt whenever a fly or wasp would dare to show its face!
That left me with one unanswered question were phobias inherited, or had those few occasions watching her mum run for the hills when faced by the smallest of flies, been etched into her mind and would we be able to overcome her fears- because her mum is still running long after the wasp or fly has given up and in some cases died!!!
The answer came late on when a house spider came out of hibernation and the law enforcer took the wee one along to her first spider catch and release mission. A mission that would be carried out in a slightly calmer manner by her than me. A Glass jar in the law enforcers hand and a spider on floor only has one outcome and that is a spider on a new adventure in the great outdoors, the wee one watched on in wonderment that the monster was so easy to catch but not only that it was let go to crawl again. Had this helped, were her fears eased and what would be the reaction the next time the wee one and spider come face to face.
The answer was not long in coming as the wee one has spent the morning with a glass in hand hunting spiders, with none safe wherever they might be hiding!
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